Reflecting God's triune nature, we are created to live in loving community with others. Too much isolation can lead to loneliness, depression, a sense of abandonment, and distorted perceptions. Cultivating healthy relationships with spouse, family, and a circle of close friends helps ensure personal support and contributes to happiness and well-being.

CONGREGATION:

Pastoral Graces: Reflections on the Care of Souls

Lee Eclov

Eclov helps pastors realize their main role of being channels of God's grace into the lives of the people they pastor. A refreshing reminder of what it means to pastor people.

PeopleSmart: Developing Your Interpersonal Intelligence

Mel Silberman

Addresses eight essential skills for relating better with people.

​Pastors are People Too

Jimmy Dodd & Larry Magnuson

In many ways, a good book for your lay leaders and board members to know more about you as a pastor. Includes chapters on the pastor's spouse and children. (Dodd is president of PastorServe and Magnuson is president of SonScape Retreats.)

RECONCILIATION - FORGIVENESS:

​Forgiving and Reconciling: Bridges to Wholeness and Hope

Everett Worthington

From a reviewer: "When we offer forgiveness to others as an altruistic gift, it is more effective than when we forgive only for our own benefit in an effort to 'get over' the hurt."

​Caring Enough to Confront: How to Understand and Express Your Deepest Feelings Toward Others.

David Augsberger

A concise, engaging book that helps us communicate more honestly with one another.

​Moving Forward: Six Steps to Forgiving Yourself and Breaking Free from the Past

Everett Worthington

A leading researcher on forgiveness and mercy talks about our tendency to ruminate on Satan, sins, and self and how to break free.

​The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict

Ken Sande

A very wise and practical guide to resolving conflict.

MARRIAGE & SPOUSES:

Confessions and Lessons from a Pastor's Spouse: Amy Luchetti. (article)

What's Different about a Pastor's Marriage? John McGee. A pastor shares insights about what is unique about being in a clergy marriage. Retrieved from: Thriving Pastor. (article)

"Sharing the Stage": Joel & Triska Rachel. A couple shares their insights of what it is like to be co-pastors. Retrieved from: Christianity Today. (article)

Soul Shepherding: Bill and Kristi Gaultiere. psychotherapists and spiritual directors, and the co-founders of Soul Shepherding, a nonprofit ministry. We care for men and women in ministry. (website)

SonScape Retreats is offering high quality retreat experiences at its three locations for clergy couples, single pastors, and ministry/denominational leaders of The Wesleyan Church at the reduced rate of 10% off published prices. These are week-long guided retreats for clergy couples and singles focused on deepening personal intimacy with Jesus and helping ministry leaders to live balanced lives in the hectic world of ministry life. SonScape has retreat centers in beautiful locations in Colorado, Tennessee and occasional off-site retreats in upstate New York.

My Letters to God: The Prayers of a Pastor's Wife

S. Corrine Davis

The wife of a pastor shares her intimate letters to God about life in the church and with her family.

Secrets of a Great Marriage- Marriage Today. Jimmy and Karen Evans#

FAMILY:

"Focus on Your Family, Not Your Sermon": Ted Cunningham. A brief article on the necessity of not getting caught up in perfectionism at the expense of your family. A good reminder of keeping "first things first." Retrieved from: Thriving Pastor (article)

"Three Lessons Learned From My PKS": John McGee. A pastor shares the lessons that his own kids taught him about growing up with a parent as a pastor. Retrieved from: Thriving Pastor. (article)

Shepherding Your Family through the Challenges of Pastoral Ministry

Brian & Cara Croft

This book looks at all the members of the pastor's family as they live and grow within the context of local church ministry. It cites the expectations, demands, and effects of the church on the pastor's family as well as encouraging suggestions for cultivating health and well-being.

​The Pastor's Kid: Finding Your Own Faith and Identity

Barnabus Piper

A firsthand account of what it is like to be a preacher's kid.

​Becoming a Healthier Pastor: Family Systems Theory and the Pastor's Own Family

Ronald W. Richardson

From Amazon review: "Addresses the roots of personal issues that may hinder a pastor's ability to function effectively. . . addresses pastors' own families of origin. . . .Richardson explores these patterns, how they operate in church situations, and how pastors can do their own family-of-origin assessment."

FRIENDS:

"The Loneliness of Leadership": Bill Gaultiere. A conversation about the intrinsic loneliness of ministry and the ways knowing Christ and others can help. (podcast)

The Friendship Factor: How to Get Closer to the People You Care For

Alan Loy McGinnis

Essentially, this is a book on how to love and to be loved. Very practical.


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